payphone
by sas93
Summary: In Las Vegas, Nevada, Natasha Romanoff, a.k.a Black Widow, is left on the out skirts after a mission went wrong. She has two numbers to dial but only enough to call one... Based on the song Payphone by Maroon 5
1. Chapter 1

**Payphone**

The mission was supposed to be just routine, in and out, Fury knew she was bored sitting around in the S.H.I.E.L.D base so had sent her on this low priority mission since no else wanted it.

She was walking bare foot across the sandy floor that was the outskirts of Las Vegas. She had no phone or anything so her forms of contact only came from the payphone that she had seen a few feet in front of her. When she had finally had reached the phone she looked in her purse to find a small amount of change that had been there for weeks.

When she had finally picked up the phone there was two numbers that she could have dialled and one of them would have been perfect to help her to get back to base and the other, well she was always going to go for that one.

She put the change in the phone and her hand had hesitated over the numbers until she took a deep breath and pushed the numbers and waiting for him to answer. There phone had rung a couple of times until he picked up.

"Hello?" He asked, with a stifled yawn.

"Clint?" she asked with a crocked tone.

She hadn't had a drink since the night before and being in the desert with the heat pounding down, she was exhausted and dehydrated.

"Tasha, where are you? You never call when you're on mission," he asked now sounding concerned.

"Nevada, well the outskirts of Las Vegas." She said leaning against the phone booth.

She would never admit it if anyone would ask but every time she was in a rough spot, all she needed was to hear his voice, whether or not they were on good terms. There was something about him that always made her feel like she was at home, at a place where she belonged.

"I told you not to go on that mission!" he shouted down the phone.

She was taken aback with his tone. He never raised his voice to her and she never raised her voice to him. They were at an equal standing with each other which was great since they were partners.

"I know, listen I need your help," she started to say.

"I know you would! I told you to wait and now where are you?"

"I'm at a payphone just outside Las Vegas. Look I don't have that much change and I need you to come and get me."

"That's a big favour Tasha; I'm still in New York. You knew this, why didn't you call Coulson?" He asked, anger coming back in his voice.

"Please." She whispered into the phone.

He was right; this was a big favour, and an unrealistic one. She should have just called S.H.I.E.L.D, they would have had her back on one of their jets by now with a nurse looking over all of her vitals to see if she was ready for round tow but she didn't want them, not all of the agents that would be there to make sure if she was alright, she wanted him, agent Clint Barton, codename Hawkeye but he never was the same since Loki had taken over his mind momentarily.

Nowadays he was more distant than ever; refusing missions with her but would always take them with lower level agents. She had left the avengers for him, to make sure that he was on the road to recovery but he just pushed her away.

Their idea of paradise would be a tough mission that required some fighting, some hard work and the pair of them working hand in hand and then when the mission was over, sit back in whatever hotel room with room service and have a nice quiet drink together. Yes, sometimes it did end her in his bed, with him wrapping his arms around her as they slept the remainder of the night away, but now, he did not want that. She thought to herself; well maybe the sun does set in paradise.

"I'm at a payphone Clint," she said trying not to croak, "I'm just trying to get home."

"Who is that honey," she heard in the background.

"Who was that Clint?" She said trying to hide her hurt.

"No one, Tasha," he said finally sounding like the old Clint.

"Clint, who was that." She demanded.

"Her name is Bobbi, she works at S.H.I.E.L.D."

"Call S.H.I.E.L.D for me." She said as she slammed the phone down.

She sunk to the floor, wondering why he was seeking company in agents that were not nearly as valuable as herself. She had assumed his distance was due Loki and his plans on using Clint to kill her but she would never have thought that he would just abandon her. She had faced the Hulk, tricked the trickster and left a very important mission to get him back home, to bring him back to herself.

Clearly her version of 'happily ever after' with Clint no longer existed, all those ideas that she had were just full of shit. Her plans that she had made for them two were not worth anything if he would not come to her when she needed him.

The S.H.I.E.L.D jet had landed and Coulson had stepped of the jet with a bottle of water and helped her up to her feet. On the jet, she had seen that the typical people were there, nurses, a few agents and Coulson. She looked for Clint but he wasn't on board. She took her seat and gulped down the bottle of water in a matter of seconds, only to be given another bottle. Coulson then gave her a thick pair of woollen socks and a pair of matching slippers.

"Your feet must be killing you," he said as he handed them to her.

She took them and slipped them onto her feet and then got her phone from Coulson again. She checked her messages and there was only one.

_You okay Nat? Text me as soon as you get this – Clint._

She smiled to herself but then the smile quickly faded. This was the extent of their relationship, a few text messages and the odd conversation if they bumped into each other at the S.H.I.E.L.D base. She hated everything about that but what she hated most of all was the fact that she had allowed herself to fall in love, even though she had said that love was for children.


	2. Chapter 2

Natasha was looking out at the Las Vegas sites as she was flying home. She looked down to the group of tiny little chapels that Clint had dragged her to once. It was shortly after Loki had attacked S.H.I.E.L.D and New York, Clint had announced his love for her and dragged her to a chapel. Outside, he had got down on one knee and asked her to marry him. She couldn't say yes, she wanted to but everything inside her was begging her to say no.

Deep down she was scared to death that any shred of happiness that they would share, would be ruined by Loki's mind control. Yes, it was clear that he wasn't under the influence of Loki. In fact, Natasha had remembered that day like it was yesterday, she broke his heart but also hers too...

"_Clint," she whispered trying to avoid attention, "get up now."_

"_No, I want to marry you. We both know that we won't have a life in S.H.I.E.L.D but I want to spend it with you. I love you Nat."_

"_Clint you know why I can't," she said, pulling him up, "Loki's mind control."_

"_He's not in my head anymore!" He almost shouted_

"_Clint, He said that he would make you kill me, slowly and intimately and then let you go just when I'm on the brink of death, when I'm past saving. I don't want to put you through that." She, tears filling up her eyes._

"_Tasha please," he begged as he opened the ring._

_It really was stunning, it was silver with a medium sized diamond so it wasn't too big, just how she would like it, and she loved it. When she had taken a closer look, she had seen that all around the diamond, there were little tiny red rubies. She gasped at the rings beauty, but she couldn't accept it. _

"_I can't, its too much," she said walking away, "With all this, Clint, I can't handle it. I'm only holding on to everything by a thin thread. I can't."_

When arriving back at S.H.I.E.L.D's base, she had seen him in the gym, laughing with a slim, blond haired woman, a bit younger than Clint but she was a lower level agent. He looked happy, no fake smile or fake laugh to match, which only made her heart ache even more. She could not be the one would make him look like that, all because of Loki. She could never marry him, or have children or have to put up with his home cooking, no matter how awful it was.

"Who is that agent?" She asked Coulson as she stopped for a moment.

"Agent Bobbi Morse, also known as Mockingbird, she's been hanging around Agent Barton a lot." Coulson said, trying to push her away from the door.

Clint had seen her through the window, and smiled at her with a small wave. It made Agent Morse turn around and offer her own smile. Natasha did nothing; she just walked into her own room, assigned to her by Fury. She curled up in a ball and wrapped her duvet around her body, refusing to cry. She didn't sleep; she just kept on thinking about the old missions, about Budapest which was where she had saved him from being captured by a hostle force. He couldn't stop saying thank you, despite his injuries and that was the night that she had promised him that if he needed saving, she would be the first to try and he had promised the same thing, but times had changed and his mental state was still unsure. Loki's hold seemed to have vanished, but he still wasn't dead yet, and if he ever even attempted to come back to Earth, she would be the first to try and kill that son of a bitch.

After about an hour, she was bored so had decided to see if Fury had any missions for her, but she knew that it was unlikely that he would send her on one just yet, give it another week and the it would be a possibility.

She walked past the cafeteria, where a lot of agents seemed to be gathered. She went in, just to see what all the fuss was about, and managed to push past the many agents, swooning over something. That's when she had seen it, everything in her wanted to cry and scream and beg him to think about what he was doing but she knew that it was not her place.

"Were getting married!" Bobbi Morse screamed to her other friends.

It had felt like someone had just punched her in the chest, she could not breathe; her heart felt like it was physically hurting with every beat. Bobbi had moved her hand around, so everyone was able to get a good look at her brand new ring and when she stopped it at Natasha, her mouth fell open. The ring that Clint had proposed had a silver band with a medium sized diamond, completed with miniscule red rubies all around the clear diamond. She looked up at Clint, tears now running down her face but she couldn't say anything. Instead, she just walked out of the cafeteria, and carried on walking until she was out of S.H.I.E.L.D. She was trying so hard to get her breath back but nothing would work. She was about to vomit when she felt a light hand on her shoulder. She turned around and it was him. He took one look at her and wrapped himself around her, trying to be the friend that he had promised that he would be.

"You okay Nat?" he asked, gently squeezing her.

"No!" she said pushing him away, "that was my ring. You had it made just for me, you said it was to show your love to me and yet you gave it to her!"

"Nat, please," he said grabbing her hand, "I love you, you know that but I want more. I want you to be included in my life as my wife. I gave you that option."

"But Loki took that away from me!" She said, crying even more, "Look I've missed out I know. I'll confess right now, I'll never love anyone like you but I can't risk it. Not for me but for you, I know you couldn't live with that and I couldn't live without you!"

"Nat..." he said, pulling her in closer, only to be pushed back again.

"I can't Clint, if I start caving in, then it will only break my heart even more. You're happy, I'm glad but honestly I'm scared to death of getting close to you. Not for you, but because of Loki. I've never told you that I love you for that reason-"

"Nat," Clint said grabbing her arms, "Shut up."

He pulled her in closer, not letting her fight back and kissed her like he had never done so before. He had needed to hear those words, so bad. Just three little words that would tell him that his feelings were returned and with this, they both knew that despite the danger, he wouldn't stop trying, he would stop loving her.


End file.
